Gunaho Ka Samandar Khaali Sirf Tere Liye Hua...........Touhid

by Mohammad Touhid on June 09, 2013, 11:05:57 PM
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Mohammad Touhid
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Jamaane Bhar Me Ruswaai Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraazgi Sirf Tere Liye Hua..


Mohabbat Ki Raahon Me Chal Rahe The Hum.,
Chot Khaaye Andhadhunagi Sirf Tere Liye Hua..


Kaanto Ke Bistar Pe Bhi Soya Tujhe Phoolo Ke Hawale Kar.,
Baagho Me Bhi Meri Badnaami Sirf Tere Liye Hua..


Jab Tak Na Dekha Tera Haseen Chehra Maine.,
Intezar Ka Poolaw Ye Khayali Sirf Tere Liye Hua..


Ek Aur Faayda Zindagi Me Kuchh Yoon Hua ‘Touhid’
Gunaho Ka Samandar Khaali Sirf Tere Liye Hua..
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Ricky
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«Reply #1 on: June 09, 2013, 11:58:05 PM »
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Janaab Tauhid, Jazbaat kaafi umda hai per iss ghazal mein kuch khamiyan hai, jaise ki:

Jamaane Bhar Me Ruswaai Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraazgi Sirf Tere Liye Hua..
Should be :

Zamaane Bhar Me Ruswa Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraaz Sirf Tere Liye Hua..

Puri ghazal mein aapne Qafiya kaayam rakhne ki liye kuch kamiya chorr di hain, umeed hai aap aage aur umda likhenge.

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Advo.RavinderaRavi
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«Reply #2 on: June 10, 2013, 12:04:09 AM »
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 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
Wonderful
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marhoom bahayaat
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«Reply #3 on: June 10, 2013, 12:22:34 AM »
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Quote from: Ricky on June 09, 2013, 11:58:05 PM
Janaab Tauhid, Jazbaat kaafi umda hai per iss ghazal mein kuch khamiyan hai, jaise ki:

Jamaane Bhar Me Ruswaai Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraazgi Sirf Tere Liye Hua..
Should be :

Zamaane Bhar Me Ruswa Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraaz Sirf Tere Liye Hua..

Puri ghazal mein aapne Qafiya kaayam rakhne ki liye kuch kamiya chorr di hain, umeed hai aap aage aur umda likhenge.




i do appreciate,sir
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@Kaash
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«Reply #4 on: June 10, 2013, 02:26:12 AM »
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badhia hai! nice ashaarz!

 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
 Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #5 on: June 10, 2013, 12:44:14 PM »
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Quote from: Ricky on June 09, 2013, 11:58:05 PM
Janaab Tauhid, Jazbaat kaafi umda hai per iss ghazal mein kuch khamiyan hai, jaise ki:

Jamaane Bhar Me Ruswaai Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraazgi Sirf Tere Liye Hua..
Should be :

Zamaane Bhar Me Ruswa Sirf Tere Liye Hua.,
Apne Mukaddar Se Naaraaz Sirf Tere Liye Hua..

Puri ghazal mein aapne Qafiya kaayam rakhne ki liye kuch kamiya chorr di hain, umeed hai aap aage aur umda likhenge.



ji bilkul sahi kaha aapne ricky ji..
khamiyon ko thik karne ke liye bahut bahut shukriya ricky ji.. Usual Smile

mai aage se dhyaan rakhunga aur aur behtar likhne ki kosis karunga..

sath dene ka shukriya.. Usual Smile
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #6 on: June 10, 2013, 12:46:26 PM »
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Quote from: Advo.RavinderaRavi on June 10, 2013, 12:04:09 AM
Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
Wonderful

shukriya ravi ji... Usual Smile
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nashwani
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«Reply #7 on: June 10, 2013, 12:56:40 PM »
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 Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause

behad khoobsurat rachna hai touhid jee..daad qubool ho..happy9
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #8 on: June 10, 2013, 04:18:11 PM »
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Quote from: @Kaash on June 10, 2013, 02:26:12 AM
badhia hai! nice ashaarz!

 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause
 Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley

bahut bahut shukriya kaash ji.. Usual Smile
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #9 on: June 10, 2013, 04:19:58 PM »
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Quote from: nashwani on June 10, 2013, 12:56:40 PM
Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley Clapping Smiley
 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause

behad khoobsurat rachna hai touhid jee..daad qubool ho..happy9

bahut bahut shukriya nashwani ji...
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BANSI DHAMEJA
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«Reply #10 on: June 10, 2013, 11:32:22 PM »
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BAHUT KHOOB Applause Applause Applause Applause
ZAMANE KA DASTOOR HAI TOUHID JI
QURBANI JISKE LIYE DETE HAIN WO USKI KEEMAT JANTA NAHIN
THES PANHUCHTI HAI DIL PE  MAGAR ZAMANA MANTA NANTA NAHIN
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aqsh
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«Reply #11 on: June 11, 2013, 01:18:34 PM »
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bahut khoob touhid ji. likhte rahiye kaafi achche ehsaas hai.dheron daad.
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sksaini4
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«Reply #12 on: June 11, 2013, 01:36:49 PM »
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waah waaah bahut khoob
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #13 on: June 11, 2013, 01:55:39 PM »
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Quote from: BANSI DHAMEJA on June 10, 2013, 11:32:22 PM
BAHUT KHOOB Applause Applause Applause Applause
ZAMANE KA DASTOOR HAI TOUHID JI
QURBANI JISKE LIYE DETE HAIN WO USKI KEEMAT JANTA NAHIN
THES PANHUCHTI HAI DIL PE  MAGAR ZAMANA MANTA NANTA NAHIN


bahut bahut shukriya bansi ji... Usual Smile
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Mohammad Touhid
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«Reply #14 on: June 11, 2013, 02:02:27 PM »
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Quote from: aqsh on June 11, 2013, 01:18:34 PM
bahut khoob touhid ji. likhte rahiye kaafi achche ehsaas hai.dheron daad.

waqt dene ka bahut bahut shukriya aqsh ji.. Usual Smile
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