durdasha

by Prateek Mardia on March 23, 2008, 09:09:16 PM
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Prateek Mardia
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Durdasha ka dosh kaise,
 mudh du maathe-mein-muqaddar
umra saari he guzaari
 kya beth kar humne nitthaale?


kuch to apne he karam,
baaki humdum ke sitam,
fir bacha kya khaakh tha,
kissmatein kiskon jaale!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kar humne nitthaale!


hashan mera to jo,
hua to so hua,
sukoon ke do pal bata,
jo kar tujhe yeh sub mile!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kur humne nitthale!


khol du jo mein pitaare,
aansuon ke honge challe,
pur rakha sanchit unhe to,
geet bante jaljale!
umra saari hey guzaari ,
kya beth kar humne nitthale!
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Rajbir
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«Reply #1 on: March 23, 2008, 09:28:19 PM »
Prateek

Aahhh ! Kya dard hai aap ki rachna mein !

Bahut achcha laga padh kar !

Keep going ! Way to go  Both Thumbs Up
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Roja
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«Reply #2 on: March 23, 2008, 09:37:53 PM »
Prateek ji. bahut accha likha hai aapne. Jaise Rajbir ji ne kaha,
bahut dard bara sher likha hai aapne. Daad hazir hai ji.
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Prateek Mardia
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«Reply #3 on: March 23, 2008, 10:45:57 PM »
Rajbir ji and Roja ji.

shukriya hauslaafzahi ka.vaakai aap log kamaal hein.


Rajbir ji ko samarpit--kyon acha lagta hein dard dooje ka sanam....

                        jhaakon khud mein,ghum kahin bhee hein na kum!


                     Prateek.
 



             
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Pooja
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«Reply #4 on: March 31, 2008, 11:11:37 PM »
bahoot hi alag tarike se apne yaha dard ko bayan kiya hai.. bahoot achi tarah se... Good creation Prateek!!
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Prateek Mardia
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«Reply #5 on: April 01, 2008, 08:46:58 AM »
thanks a lot pooja ji.
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Muhammed
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«Reply #6 on: November 17, 2008, 10:44:37 AM »
Quote from: Prateek Mardia on March 23, 2008, 09:09:16 PM
Durdasha ka dosh kaise,
 mudh du maathe-mein-muqaddar
umra saari he guzaari
 kya beth kar humne nitthaale?


kuch to apne he karam,
baaki humdum ke sitam,
fir bacha kya khaakh tha,
kissmatein kiskon jaale!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kar humne nitthaale!


hashan mera to jo,
hua to so hua,
sukoon ke do pal bata,
jo kar tujhe yeh sub mile!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kur humne nitthale!


khol du jo mein pitaare,
aansuon ke honge challe,
pur rakha sanchit unhe to,
geet bante jaljale!
umra saari hey guzaari ,
kya beth kar humne nitthale!

Prateek ji..Samuchi rachna sundar Lagi..Prateyk Pankti Mei dard evam dukh..kaafi achhi tarha se Likha hai
bahut sundar..!!!
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khwahish
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«Reply #7 on: November 17, 2008, 08:26:34 PM »
Bahut Ache Prateekji,
Ek alag andaaz mein aapne yeh kavita likhi hai.. Applause Applause Applause
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Azeem Azaad
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«Reply #8 on: November 17, 2008, 09:10:31 PM »
Nice One Prateek,.
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Shikha12
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«Reply #9 on: November 17, 2008, 09:58:12 PM »
Quote from: Prateek Mardia on March 23, 2008, 09:09:16 PM
Durdasha ka dosh kaise,
 mudh du maathe-mein-muqaddar
umra saari he guzaari
 kya beth kar humne nitthaale?


kuch to apne he karam,
baaki humdum ke sitam,
fir bacha kya khaakh tha,
kissmatein kiskon jaale!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kar humne nitthaale!


hashan mera to jo,
hua to so hua,
sukoon ke do pal bata,
jo kar tujhe yeh sub mile!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kur humne nitthale!


khol du jo mein pitaare,
aansuon ke honge challe,
pur rakha sanchit unhe to,
geet bante jaljale!
umra saari hey guzaari ,
kya beth kar humne nitthale!


So Different.. But Still So Near to Life..
This can be done by you only Prateek Ji..
Amazing Work.. Applause Applause
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Prateek Mardia
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«Reply #10 on: November 24, 2008, 08:25:52 PM »
Quote from: Muhammed on November 17, 2008, 10:44:37 AM
Prateek ji..Samuchi rachna sundar Lagi..Prateyk Pankti Mei dard evam dukh..kaafi achhi tarha se Likha hai
bahut sundar..!!!

aapko yeh rachna pasand aayi,mujhey khushi he -dard aur dukh se acchi pehchaan hai bhai apni.
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Prateek Mardia
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«Reply #11 on: November 24, 2008, 08:27:25 PM »
Quote from: khwaish on November 17, 2008, 08:26:34 PM
Bahut Ache Prateekji,
Ek alag andaaz mein aapne yeh kavita likhi hai.. Applause Applause Applause
Quote from: Jaanasheen on November 17, 2008, 09:10:31 PM
Nice One Prateek,.

Quote from: Mahiya on November 17, 2008, 09:58:12 PM

So Different.. But Still So Near to Life..
This can be done by you only Prateek Ji..
Amazing Work.. Applause Applause

aap sub ka shukriya ki aap ne meri saadharan si panktiyon ko samman diya. aabhar.
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bekarar
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«Reply #12 on: November 24, 2008, 10:19:08 PM »
Quote from: Prateek Mardia on March 23, 2008, 09:09:16 PM
Durdasha ka dosh kaise,
 mudh du maathe-mein-muqaddar
umra saari he guzaari
 kya beth kar humne nitthaale?


kuch to apne he karam,
baaki humdum ke sitam,
fir bacha kya khaakh tha,
kissmatein kiskon jaale!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kar humne nitthaale!


hashan mera to jo,
hua to so hua,
sukoon ke do pal bata,
jo kar tujhe yeh sub mile!
umra saari he guzaari,
kya beth kur humne nitthale!


khol du jo mein pitaare,
aansuon ke honge challe,
pur rakha sanchit unhe to,
geet bante jaljale!
umra saari hey guzaari ,
kya beth kar humne nitthale!

baat bahoot sahi hai....ki aakhir sirf bhagy ko hi dosh kyun...kuch to humne bhi kiya hi hoga....
khoob hi likha hai prateek ji aapne...badhai


dosh dete durdasha ka,
bhagya ko hain karmheen,
aur bane rahte hain sabke,
samne wo deen-heen,

har vytha ke samne,
taal thok lalkaar ke,
door hongi aadhi to,
matr teri hunkaar se,

aur bachi jo shesh,
unko khule dil sweekar le,
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Pooja
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«Reply #13 on: November 24, 2008, 10:57:09 PM »
bahoot sahi farmaya apne Bekarar ji!!
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Prateek Mardia
Guest
«Reply #14 on: November 25, 2008, 12:53:57 AM »
Quote from: bekarar on November 24, 2008, 10:19:08 PM
baat bahoot sahi hai....ki aakhir sirf bhagy ko hi dosh kyun...kuch to humne bhi kiya hi hoga....
khoob hi likha hai prateek ji aapne...badhai


dosh dete durdasha ka,
bhagya ko hain karmheen,
aur bane rahte hain sabke,
samne wo deen-heen,

har vytha ke samne,
taal thok lalkaar ke,
door hongi aadhi to,
matr teri hunkaar se,

aur bachi jo shesh,
unko khule dil sweekar le,


bahut shukriya bekarar ji.

aapney to raana pratap aur raana saanga ki yaad dila di apni panktiyon mein.
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