Navakif hain hum Chhupayen kya

by @kaash on January 08, 2011, 05:35:15 PM
Pages: [1]
Print
Author  (Read 557 times)
@kaash
Guest
is ghazal ko maine is 2-1-2/2-1-2-1/1-2-2/2-1
beher par koshish ki hai


kitna hai dard tumhe bataye.n kya
navakif hain hum chhupaye.n kya

aaiyna hi toota hai duniya ka
phir sune kya sunyaye.n kya

phirte hain vo hi chehre bus
hain nahi apna nakaab hataye.n kya

koi gair hi nahi hai jab kahin
phir haath badhke milaye.n kya

vo aur honge jo dushman mane
'kaash' dosti se fursat paaye.n kya
Logged
ParwaaZ
WeCare
Umda Shayar
*

Rau: 34
Offline Offline

Waqt Bitaya:
66 days, 11 hours and 16 minutes.

Posts: 5624
Member Since: Aug 2010


View Profile WWW
«Reply #1 on: January 09, 2011, 12:08:33 AM »
Kaash Sahab Aadaab!

Aapki Yeh bher band Gazal ki koshish khoob rahi..
Janab hume bher ka jyada to knowledge nahi hai..

Par aapki koshish dekhkar achcha laga..
Koshish Jari rakhiye...  Usual Smile

Chaliye aapki kalaam par aate hai ...
Hum ahsaas O khayaal dekhte hai.. Bher ke bare meiN
yahaaN ke khususi shayar hi aapse bataayeN to humara
Bhi fayada hoga.. Usual Smile         




is ghazal ko maine is 2-1-2/2-1-2-1/1-2-2/2-1
beher par koshish ki hai


kitna hai dard tumhe bataye.n kya
navakif hain hum chhupaye.n kya

Masha Allah Janab Matle ka khayaal behad khoob hai daad hazir hai..
         



aaiyna hi toota hai duniya ka
phir sune kya sunyaye.n kya

Janab Sher meiN rabta nazar nahi aaya hume... Muafi chahte hai shayad humari kam akhli hai..Usual Smile

Aainaa Dekhne ki rivayat rakhta hai.. so dusre misre meiN aap DekheN kia dikhaayeN kia kahte to kuch baat nazar aati.. Yaa phir toota ki jagaaH "jhuta" kar le to bhi baat ban sakti hai... yeh humari rai hai... aap aur bhi behtar soch sakte hai.. Usual Smile           



phirte hain vo hi chehre bus
hain nahi apna nakaab hataye.n kya

Kia baat hai janab Daad daad daad Usual Smile
Bahut khoob ... Usual Smile         



koi gair hi nahi hai jab kahin
phir haath badhke milaye.n kya

Hmmmm Kafi achchi soNch ka muzahera kia hai
janab daad ... Usual Smile         



vo aur honge jo dushman mane
'kaash' dosti se fursat paaye.n kya


Maqta bhi la jawaab kaha hai janab.. Daad...         

Aapki bher bandi ki koshish ke bare meiN hum thode confuse hai... Coz humare ilm meiN aapki kalaam pakke bher meiN nahi hai janab... Usual Smile
Is par koi ustaad shayar hi roshni daleN to hum bhi jahaaN jahaaN atke hai hume samjhne aur sikhane meiN madat mileNgi....

Aap koshish jari rakhiye...
Aap ki koshish rang layeNgi...

Gar humari koi baat na gawaar guzare to tahe dil se mazarrat chahte hai janab.. Usual Smile

Khuda aapki kalam meiN zor bakhse..
Likhate rahiye...

Khush O aabad rahiye...
Khuda Hafez... Usual Smile         



Logged
Mann
Poetic Patrol
Khaas Shayar
**

Rau: 0
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Waqt Bitaya:
44 days, 3 hours and 52 minutes.

Posts: 10948
Member Since: Mar 2006


View Profile
«Reply #2 on: January 09, 2011, 04:33:57 PM »
Wah Bhai kya baat hai.. Bahut dino baad aapko Padha.. aur Padh par Dil bahut accha laga.. Behad Lajawab Rachna hai.. Daad kubool karen.. Applause Applause



**~** Mann **~**


Logged
Rishi Agarwal
Umda Shayar
*

Rau: 14
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
Waqt Bitaya:
28 days, 5 hours and 40 minutes.

साहित्य सागर

Posts: 6756
Member Since: Jul 2009


View Profile
«Reply #3 on: January 11, 2011, 02:41:06 PM »
Bahut Khub Kash JI Bahut Sunder Likha Hai Aapne Applause Applause
:
Logged
Pages: [1]
Print
Jump to:  


Get Yoindia Updates in Email.

Enter your email address:

Ask any question to expert on eTI community..
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
November 18, 2019, 03:00:21 AM

Login with username, password and session length
Recent Replies
[November 18, 2019, 02:36:03 AM]

[November 18, 2019, 12:09:17 AM]

[November 18, 2019, 12:05:08 AM]

[November 18, 2019, 12:03:46 AM]

[November 18, 2019, 12:02:08 AM]

[November 18, 2019, 12:00:17 AM]

[November 17, 2019, 11:59:35 PM]

[November 17, 2019, 11:58:56 PM]

[November 17, 2019, 11:57:59 PM]

[November 17, 2019, 11:57:14 PM]
Yoindia Shayariadab Copyright © MGCyber Group All Rights Reserved
Terms of Use| Privacy Policy Powered by PHP MySQL SMF© Simple Machines LLC
Page created in 0.163 seconds with 26 queries.
[x] Join now community of 48406 Real Poets and poetry admirer