dil bhi tumhare jaisa hai.....

by sana Afroz on November 25, 2014, 10:08:13 AM
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sana Afroz
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dil bhi tumhare jaisa hai,jazbaat mohtaram,
aakhir kahaan se ho gaii aukaat meri kam?

aisi hawa chali mere dil ki zameen par,
chehrey se sari ho gayii shadabiyan adam.

mujhko sikhaye waqt ne halaat ke sabaq,
rakhenge ab se apne khyalaat ka bharam.

mujh par radeef qafiye ki had na baandhna,
aazad mera dil hai aur aazad hai qalam.

raton ko jaag jaag k tanhaiyon mein main,
shairon mein teri yaad ko karti rahi raqam.

kuch bhi kahoon 'sana' sab befuzool hai,
Aati nahin jo unko kisi fail par sharam.


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jeet jainam
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«Reply #1 on: November 25, 2014, 12:08:07 PM »
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Bohat khub
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qadeer_junaid
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«Reply #2 on: November 25, 2014, 12:29:47 PM »
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aadab mahutramah sana sahibah ...ghazal achi hai taham lafz naram aur khatam ...qafiya nahi ho sakte ...chunke sahi lafz narm aur khatm hai ...matle ka doosra misra bhr se kharij bhi hai ..

akhiri misre ko yun kar len mazeed khoobsurat ho jayega

aazaad mera dil hai aur aazaad hai qalam ..


aap koi aur qafiye dhond kar naram aur khatam ko hata den to bahtar hoga ..


dua go

qadeertoopchi
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #3 on: November 25, 2014, 01:25:03 PM »
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aadab mahutramah sana sahibah ...ghazal achi hai taham lafz naram aur khatam ...qafiya nahi ho sakte ...chunke sahi lafz narm aur khatm hai ...matle ka doosra misra bhr se kharij bhi hai ..

akhiri misre ko yun kar len mazeed khoobsurat ho jayega

aazaad mera dil hai aur aazaad hai qalam ..


aap koi aur qafiye dhond kar naram aur khatam ko hata den to bahtar hoga ..


dua go

qadeertoopchi
shukriya !!!! Qadeer shb. Maine kuch tabdeeli ki hai ab to behtar lag rha hai...
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #4 on: November 25, 2014, 01:26:03 PM »
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Bohat khub
shukriya!!!! Jeet ji...
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sksaini4
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«Reply #5 on: November 25, 2014, 01:26:57 PM »
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 Applause Applause
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #6 on: November 25, 2014, 01:45:57 PM »
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Applause Applause
shukriya ;!!! Sksaini ji.

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Iftakhar Ahmad
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«Reply #7 on: November 25, 2014, 03:11:45 PM »
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Sana Afroz jee, bahut achha laga aapko padh ke, aati rahiye, ghazal ke liye dheroN daad aur ek Rau. Aur haaN ek baat aur kahuNga ke post ki heading meN saath apna naam bhi likh diya kareN.
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #8 on: November 25, 2014, 04:24:08 PM »
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Sana Afroz jee, bahut achha laga aapko padh ke, aati rahiye, ghazal ke liye dheroN daad aur ek Rau. Aur haaN ek baat aur kahuNga ke post ki heading meN saath apna naam bhi likh diya kareN.
shukriya!!!! Daad aur rau donon k liye..
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irshad ahmed siddiqui
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«Reply #9 on: November 25, 2014, 05:12:55 PM »
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bahut khooooob. ......
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #10 on: November 25, 2014, 07:23:40 PM »
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Shukriyaa!!!!!!
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surindarn
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«Reply #11 on: November 25, 2014, 10:30:47 PM »
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Waah waah Sana jee bahut sunder ehsaas hai. Yeh kaafiye kaa mujhe bhi samajhnaa pahreh gaa, isse darzi log bhi Istmal karte hain, to kyaa woh bhi seekhnee ho gee.
 icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower

 
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #12 on: November 26, 2014, 12:14:11 AM »
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Waah waah Sana jee bahut sunder ehsaas hai. Yeh kaafiye kaa mujhe bhi samajhnaa pahreh gaa, isse darzi log bhi Istmal karte hain, to kyaa woh bhi seekhnee ho gee.
 icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower

 

shukriya !!!! Surindarn ji,   ghazal ko pasand karne ka..

main abhi shayri seekhne ki raah par hoon yunhi kabhi kabhi natural feelings lafzon mein dhal jati hain..
 yoindia par VB shb aur Qadeer toopchi shb jaise tajurbakar logon se islah karwa leti hoon.
.  Ye darzi wali baat samajh nhii aaii,plz wazaahat karein..
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saahill
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«Reply #13 on: November 26, 2014, 02:34:15 AM »
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Superb lines sana ji  Applause.
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sana Afroz
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«Reply #14 on: November 26, 2014, 02:55:10 AM »
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Superb lines sana ji  Applause.

shukriyaa!!! Sahill shb...
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