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Author Topic: Rail jaa chuki hai, Khamoshi aur Sannata hai.  (Read 476 times)
Ricky
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« on: March 06, 2007, 06:25:40 AM »
Before posting the poem, I just want to say few lines.

You goto railway station for 2 reasons, either to get the train or to drop someone. Its about the moment just after the train left the station on a dark , lone railway station...


My poem is all about that ..
    Jaa chuke hain sab aur wahi khamoshi chaayi hai,
        Pasara hain har oar sannata, tanhai muskurai hai..

        Chhoot chuki hai rail,
        Chand lamho ki toh baat thi,

        kya raunak thi yahaan,
        Jaisi Saji koi mehfil khaas thi!!

        Ajnabi thae chehre saare,
        Phir bhi unse mulaaqaat thi..

        Bheji thi kisi ne apnayiyat,
        Salam mein woh kya baat thi..

        Ek pal thae aap Jaise Kausar,
        Ab bachi akeli raat thi...

        Chalo ab laut chale yahan sae,
        chhoot chuki hai rail
        Yeh ab guzari baat thi...

        Urte kaghaz,karte bayan,
        Inki bhi kisi sae ,
        do pal pehle kuch baat thi...

        Barr chale kadam,
        kanare un pateriyon
        kahani jinke roz ye saath thi...

        Phir aayegi dooji rail,
        phir cheeregi ye sannnata,
        jaise zindagi sae phir mulaqat thi...

        phir luatenge aur ,
        bhari kadmo sae, jaise
        koi gehri see baat thi.

        Chhoot chuki hai rail,
        Ab sirf kaali syaha raat thi.

अब इसी कविता को देवनागरी में लिखा गया है

   
    जा चुके है सब और वही खामोशी छायी है,
        पसरा है हर ओर सन्नाटा, तन्हाई मुस्कुराई है,

        छूट चुकी है रेल ,
        चंद लम्हों की तो बात थी,

        क्या रौनक थी यहॉं,
        जैसे सजी कोई महफिल खास थी,

        अजनबी थे चेहरे सारे,
        फिर भी उनसे मुलाक़ात थी,

        भेजी थी किसी ने अपनाइयत,
        सलाम मे वो क्या बात थी,

        एक पल थे आप जैसे क़ौसर,
        अब बची अकेली रात थी,

        चलो अब लौट चलें यहॉं से,
        छूट चुकी है रेल
        ये अब गुज़री बात थी,

        उङते काग़ज़, करते बयान्‍,
        इनकी भी किसी से
        दो पल पहले मुलाक़ात थी,

        बढ़ चले क़दम,
        कनारे उन पटरियों
        कहानी जिनके रोज़ ये साथ थी,

        फिर आएगी दूजी रेल,
        फिर चीरेगी ये सन्नाटा
        जैसे जिन्दगी से फिर मुलाक़ात थी,

        फिर लौटेंगे और,
        भारी क़दमों से,जैसे
        कोई गहरी सी बात थी,

        छूट चुकी है रेल,
        अब सिर्फ काली स्याहा रात थी |
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« Reply #1 on: March 06, 2007, 10:53:19 AM »
=D>  =D>  =D>  =D>

Very Nice Expression Ricky.....Awsome Usual Smile
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Ricky
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« Reply #2 on: March 06, 2007, 01:11:34 PM »
Thankyou ..
It really took me time to compile and post it .
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Celmira
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« Reply #3 on: March 06, 2007, 01:19:24 PM »
Very good Ricky !!!
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Pooja
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« Reply #4 on: March 07, 2007, 02:16:40 PM »
wah kaya baat hai, bahoot hi ache tarike se eaplain kiya hai.... Good work Ricky!!!
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« Reply #5 on: March 07, 2007, 02:41:44 PM »
Liked it very Much... =D> =D>

Actually the theme is just Awesome and Also very perfectly penned down... Very Nice...
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« Reply #6 on: March 07, 2007, 03:39:58 PM »
Ricky

Bahut he achcha likha hai !

Aur us se bhi zyada achcha laga aap ka devanagri mein uska anuwaad =D> =D> =D>
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Tosha
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« Reply #7 on: March 08, 2007, 06:40:30 PM »
to be honest ... this is a real different and meaningful poem i'v read fm you so far ... that appears to have come out of hearthand not just a game of words. :D
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Ricky
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« Reply #8 on: March 09, 2007, 12:23:13 AM »
Usual Smile ..
That is good to see that everyone liked the poem Usual Smile.

BTW, Tosha, where were you from last few days ?
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« Reply #9 on: March 12, 2007, 01:20:09 AM »
Ricki ji its really very nice... Mujhe asch much railway station pa rhone aa aabas hua mano aap ki saari baatein aanko k samne ho rahi ho..

superb.. & different.. Its nice
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« Reply #10 on: March 12, 2007, 02:57:03 AM »
Beautifulllllll! wah wah!
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« Reply #11 on: March 12, 2007, 04:47:26 AM »
bahot   khoob  Ricky.........  very  nice poem.....
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..
jiski aankhen mujhe ander se padhsakti ho
koi  chehra to mere shaher mein aisa laa de
--------------------------------------------------
Humein Talash Hai Duniya Mein Aise Logon Ki
Jo Doosharon K Liye Khud Ko Bhool Jaate Hain.
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Ricky
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« Reply #12 on: March 13, 2007, 01:20:59 PM »
Deepika_divya, nice to read your comments & thankx for it.

Also, Thanx pyarikudi and waheed.
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