nazm se din............

by mamta bajpai on April 21, 2010, 08:18:31 PM
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mamta bajpai
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nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten
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«Reply #1 on: April 21, 2010, 08:21:43 PM »
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bahut khoob Mamta ji... bahut khoob...!!!
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mamta bajpai
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«Reply #2 on: April 21, 2010, 08:26:28 PM »
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Shihabji,Klaskarji aap dono hzarat ka dil se shukriya...
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«Reply #3 on: April 22, 2010, 11:29:31 AM »
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nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten
Wah kya baat hai         Mamta Bajpai ji....



Nazm sey din gujren aur ghazal si gujren har raat
isey zada kya maangu khuda bas itni si dua dena
yun hi zindagi ka har pal gujren unke saath....
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«Reply #4 on: April 22, 2010, 11:35:29 AM »
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nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten

Bohat KhuuB Mamta Ji...

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«Reply #5 on: April 22, 2010, 04:21:46 PM »
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Marhaba Mamta ji kya hi khub andaaz mein sunder poem likhi hai aapne. Lafzon ka intekhab jis mafhoom ke saath kiya hai hai wo behad khoobsurat hai. Keep writing.
nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten
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«Reply #6 on: April 23, 2010, 03:50:07 PM »
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nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten
Devi ji !!! aap bahut achha likhti hein  Applause Applause Applause
kitni asani aap hale dil bayan karti kabile tareef hai
is sher ko thik kariye pls mujhe kafiye ki samazh nahi hai, kuch gadbad dikhti hai ismein abhi

Tumko kya hai tum to gazalein kah kar dil ki aag bujha logi,
uske ji se poocho jo patthar ki tarah chup rahta hai....
badi muddat hui unke rukhsar ki dhup nahi ayi,
yuhi hi nahi mera zehan itna thanda rahta hai....
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mamta bajpai
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«Reply #7 on: April 24, 2010, 01:00:20 AM »
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Shukriya sahib!!zahe-naseeb !aap ki taareef ne humare kamjor hauslon ko bulndi ata farmayee.bahut bahut achcha laga.
aap chahen to kuch yoon bayan ki ja sakti  hai ye line


KAHIN LAFZON KE DARIYA ME KOI DIL KE SHOLEY DHOTA HAI
IDHAR MERE DIL SE POOCHO JO PATTHAR KI TARAH CHUP RAHTA HAI
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mamta bajpai
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«Reply #8 on: April 24, 2010, 01:12:29 AM »
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YA PHIR IS TARAH

KAHIN LAFZON KE SAMANDAR ME KOI DIL KI KASTI DUBOTA HAI
IDHAR MERE DIL KO DEKHO,PATTHAR KI TARAH CHUP RAHTA HAI

Shukriya, nawazish aap ne hume is qabil samjha.........
rounq-e-mahfil badhate rahiye............
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«Reply #9 on: April 24, 2010, 01:27:42 AM »
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Wah! Mamta ji kamaal ka likha hai aap ne
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mamta bajpai
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«Reply #10 on: April 24, 2010, 01:35:17 AM »
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Dhanywad Harish ji! khayal ka moti to side ji ne hi diya maine to sirf unhen piroya bhar hai.
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«Reply #11 on: April 24, 2010, 03:39:52 PM »
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Shukriya sahib!!zahe-naseeb !aap ki taareef ne humare kamjor hauslon ko bulndi ata farmayee.bahut bahut achcha laga.
aap chahen to kuch yoon bayan ki ja sakti  hai ye line


KAHIN LAFZON KE DARIYA ME KOI DIL KE SHOLEY DHOTA HAI
IDHAR MERE DIL SE POOCHO JO PATTHAR KI TARAH CHUP RAHTA HAI

Aye zindgi zindgi humse kya kami rah gayi....
uski ankh ki kor mein kyu nami rah gayi.....
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«Reply #12 on: April 24, 2010, 04:02:22 PM »
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Wah wah wah Mamtaji bade sunder shabdo se
sawaaraa hai aapne aapka ye khayaal... Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause

Milte hain unnsay hum sehme sehme
Bade khush-gawar hain ye hasin lamhe

Badi rochak hoti hain unki baatein
Hoti rahein unse yu he mulakaatein



nazm se din hain aur gazal si raaten
khayyam ki rubai si dilkash teri baaten
ay chand!thahar mahfil me sitaron ki zara
baqi unse hain abhi kuch khas mulaqaten
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«Reply #13 on: April 24, 2010, 04:17:55 PM »
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wah mamta ji wah. icon_flower icon_flower icon_flower
achhi lines hain.
comparision is good.
feeling is very good.
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«Reply #14 on: April 24, 2010, 05:22:33 PM »
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Sideffect-ji ek koshish mai bhi kar rahi hu aapke sher ko kafia dene ki...
Pasand aaye tou daad dijiyega.....


Tumne tou apna sab dard shabdo mein dhaal deeya
Mujhe dekho pahaad sa dard patthar ban seh leeya

Muddat hui unke rukhsar ki dhup ayi nahi,
Warnaa Mera zehan itna thanda rahta nahi...


Devi ji !!! aap bahut achha likhti hein  Applause Applause Applause
kitni asani aap hale dil bayan karti kabile tareef hai
is sher ko thik kariye pls mujhe kafiye ki samazh nahi hai, kuch gadbad dikhti hai ismein abhi

Tumko kya hai tum to gazalein kah kar dil ki aag bujha logi,
uske ji se poocho jo patthar ki tarah chup rahta hai....
badi muddat hui unke rukhsar ki dhup nahi ayi,
yuhi hi nahi mera zehan itna thanda rahta hai....
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